God has been at work in my life in some pretty huge ways, so it’s about time I share some of the juicy details.
Last week I went on a little adventure. We’re going to call it the journey of the “Stolen” purse, mmkay?
I was coming off of a week of some serious hormone-induced craziness (the kind which makes you think you need professional, medical help to overcome) but I had finally started to see the light at the end of that tunnel.
Not one day later, I found myself frantically searching for my favorite purse. It was no where to be found.
Do you know this awful feeling? The sinking feeling in your stomach?!
I had seen it earlier in the very busy day, so we retraced my steps (on date night, no less!) SO we searched and searched, leaving NO stone unturned.
To no avail.
Purse = Gone.
Me = Crushed.
I was plummeted back into emotional turmoil, especially because this wasn’t “just a purse.”
A little back story…
This missing purse was gifted to me by a very particular group of someones.
On Mother’s Day, my babes made me feel like a queen. They woke up early to cheer me on at my first half marathon in a long time. Then, they continued to pour love on me all day in the form of hugs, kisses, naps, flowers, and a special present. I unwrapped this beautiful present and inside was a purse.
Not just any purse. A beautiful, floral, PINK, Kate Spade that took my breath away. Mostly because it was from them, but also because it was perfect.
(Never mind if I picked it out myself; they still gave it to me, wrapped and beautiful and filled with love.)
I used said purse every single day from Mother’s Day on. And when it disappeared last week, I felt so particularly crushed.
I concluded, woefully, that I must have left my van unlocked in downtown Davenport and foolishly left the purse within view, cash and all. I beat myself up inside. I started believing on a deeper level that I was nothing but a liability to our family (My thoughts tend to drift in this direction when left unchecked.)
Certainly someone had reached in and taken it, as any human would with a purse that lovely. It was the only explanation.
SO, I did what any good Christian would do. I flailed my arms and chose to be depressed for a day and a half, beating myself up for being so careless.
CRANKY PANTS was in the house.
I even filed a police report, hoping that at least the bag would somehow show up. I also threw up some halfhearted prayers like “Lord, please help me stop being sad and obsessed.” LAME.
And then something miraculous happened, somewhere in the last part of that second day of being depressed, it was almost as if God answered that lame-o prayer and grabbed me by the shoulders and said “HELLO, GIRLFRIEND. DO YOU REALIZE WHAT ARE YOU OBSESSING OVER?! SOMETHING WORTH $500 IS GOING TO HOLD YOU DOWN THIS HARD? NOT IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT. ” Or something to that effect.
He then orchestrated a convo with a good friend which developed into her praying over my sorry face (via Voxer like all good mommy friends because #momlife 😉 and she prayed for some incredible things.
She prayed for a miracle for my purse to be found (not happening, love, I thought). Then she prayed for my purse stealer to find Jesus through this simple act of thievery (which touched my heart profoundly) and ultimately she thanked God that he has given me EVERYTHING I need, everything.
Which is so humblingly true.
This scripture had been streaming through my head on repeat.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” -Jesus, Matthew 6
My heart had been so fixed on the here and now, the material things. The STUFF. And I needed to open my iron fist and trust that God has it.
All of it. My life. My brother’s life. My kids’ lives. Provision. Rest. Peace. Grace. Forgiveness. You know, just everything that ever mattered and more in his strong, capable hands.
“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Phil 4:19
So this whole encounter became a rich and deep reminder that my joy can’t come from possessions. They’re fleeting and failing. Eventually, they will grow tattered and torn. Money? It runs out. It can be stolen. We can’t take it with us. We can manage it well, sure. But it can’t be our security, or we’ll wind up sorely disappointed.
The love of a perfect father, on the other hand? It never fails. It never leaves us empty or wanting. His peace can come when it doesn’t make sense.
And I praised GOD for taking away my obsession with this purse and starting to heal my selfish heart. I started making phone calls and ordering new credit cards. I got a new license ordered. All that fun stuff, one step at a time, as an act of obedience, surrender, and choosing joy.
His peace came when the purse was still lost, which made no sense. But then, he did something even better.
Do you want to hear the end of the story??
TWO WHOLE ENTIRE days after I gave up control and started to surrender my heart and desires to the Lord, it turned up. In THE least expected place, you guys.
Embarrassing as it is, the purse was found under a blasted pile of clothes in my Annabelle’s closet. I don’t even know?? I don’t even understand how it got there (she did have some friends over to play on that busy day so maybe someone wanted to play “mommy?!”) My purse was “stolen” by a toddler and and I didn’t even care!!
All I felt in that moment was pure joy and provision by a Father who knew all along.
<3 God used this lost and found purse to restore my faith in His provision and refresh my faith.
This purse, err, I mean this Jesus continues to amaze me!!