I’m 29 years old. We had Apple computers in my third grade classroom. I think I’m supposed to know how to use these dang** technological thingys by now.
Usually, I can fake it til I make it. I can type 100 words per minute. I get Facebook, hyperlinks, short cuts, Pinterest and Instagram. I’m not a computer idiot.
But my website. Mail chimp. Snap Chat. Y’all. I know I’m almost 30, but I feel like I’m 80 with the attention span of a 4 year old.
I don’t freaking * get them. I can’t figure out how to get an opt-in thingy-ma-jaggy that works added to my website. I spent inhumane amounts of time getting my welcome email prepped and my chapter formatted to send out for my “freebie.” And now here I am, sitting with my tacos getting cold, struggling like a little ant in a cup of milk to get it synced up. What the heck is Mail Munch and why is it not being friends with Mail Chimp? What does it all mean?!
I thought I could do this. I breathed deep and pep-talked myself over and over, “Google is your friend. Tutorials are out there to help incompetent people like you. YOU CAN FIGURE THIS DANG* STUFF* OUT.” But no, two hours of neglecting the kids later and I’m right back where I began. This is my face right now.
Some days, you just live and learn. And you tuck that knowledge in your back pocket to make you better tomorrow. Darn it. Positivity you had to wiggle your way into this one too, didn’t ya?
Is there a single writer out there who hasn’t had a day’s work lost? A day on which they wanted to throw their computer at the tile floor in frustration?! No, there isn’t. (If you exist, you should probably be doing smart computer people things like talking in code and designing apps and making way more cash.)
Even if I didn’t get the productive solo date night as envisioned, I did get a diet coke with cherries and some delicious crispy chicken tacos. And a shoot* ton of chips and salsa. Which totally counts for something. (The hubby had the quite rare Tuesday-night-date night conflict so I kept the sitter and went out for some writing time).
Good riddance, Tuesday blog trouble and these ridiculous first world problems.
Here is to Wednesday bringing instant gratification, easy web-designing-and-mail-chimping and perfectly behaved children.
And I know this will work so….go sign up for my email newsletter right here. <—On this easy for me to understand old school link. And someday, whether it’s now or in like 6 years when I figure it out, you will get goodies and freebies and fun/funny/hope-infested emails from yours truly.
Love your tired writer-mommy friend,
**Insert appropriate/inappropriate curse word of your choice. Because. We all know some emotions just can’t be expressed fully with dang/shoot/heck.
***I clearly need some holy yoga tonight for my solo-date night instead of web designing. insertyogagirlemoji***
When are emojis coming to a real keyboard near us?!